Editorial: Who's Playing Who?
Okay, first things first- if the majority of my readers really want me to stop posting these little personal updates on the weekends, I'll certainly stop. The only reason I do it in the first place is because my virtua-diary got a gigantic response late last year, but I know things can get old. I always focus on gaming for my Week in Review, but really, if you're all sick of my mini-dramas, I'll just stop. I'm no attention whore (never have been; hate the idea), and I don't mind letting you guys into my life here and there, but I know some people may get bored. So just let me know.
Now, moving on. You can read previous features over the past few weeks to get up to speed but as a quick refresher, we're dealing with Ms. Amy and Ms. Courtney (no, not their real names, although the first letter of each is correct); both of whom seem to have struck a friendly deal that they each "get a shot" at me, and I'm allowed to select which one gets the prize. ...I try to make this sound optimistic and all bad-ass and stuff, but those who may be familiar with the situation know just how precarious it really is. Ms. Courtney was the first who showed interest, then Ms. Amy popped into the picture and the two made this completely abnormal and suspicious deal. I know everyone wants to know what they look like, but really, the best I can do is to have you picture pretty, professional ladies in their late '20s; all kinda "Sex and the City"-like. One's a broker; the other is an insurance executive (I live in CT, after all). Both have similar body types (slender, average height, etc.), but Ms. Courtney is blonde and Ms. Amy has auburn hair.
Now, just to get this out there- I've already slept with Ms. Amy (yeah, that's right...I told you I'd write it for everyone to see, "Ms. Amy!"), which I figured would be the end of the deal. I figured that despite their supposed "deal," Ms. Courtney would just snap and that'd be it. No. Actually, she wanted effing details. Then she just wanted to make sure she still "had a chance," and once again confirmed a date for the middle of this past week. I talked to Arnold and we both admit to being confused, although he's insistent on bringing up the "threesome" possibility. I refuse to go with that, but we do agree that at this point, I'm little more than a marionette and there's really no way to escape the eventual talons. However, I didn't get to see Ms. Courtney this week because I had a root canal that day and I really wasn't in the mood to do...well, anything. But she remains insistent. And now that I postponed that, both want to meet me for drinks at Ultra 88 (club at Mohegan Sun) at 11:00 p.m. tomorrow night. That's right, chickadees; this sh** is public now. If you try to kidnap me and toss me into a dungeon of torture somewhere, I gots peeps backin' me up.
...uh...you guys are backing me up, right? Anyway, I'm thinking I should just stop the insanity and tell Ms. Courtney that although every man likes the idea of sleeping with two hot chicks without either getting pissed, the risk is too great. Ms. Amy is great and we had fun. So...go with Ms. Amy? Yes? Or is it wrong, as Ms. Courtney initially asked for my number in the first place?
5/15/2009 Ben Dutka